SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE

A few weeks ago I had taken my wife for her usual visit to the gynecologist. While we sat at the reception waiting to be attended to, one of the women waiting with us couldn’t help noticing my wife’s beautiful bag. She inquired from her where she had gotten it from and that sparked off a conversation as is the habit of the female gender. Feeling left out by this “bag business” I buried myself on my “toy” as I partially listened to the ongoing conversation. 

When this lady’s turn came to go in, she quickly asked for my wife’s contacts. My wife flashed out her business card and when the lady realized that my wife and I were marriage counselors, she made a statement that set me thinking. This is what she said, “when I have problems in my marriage I know now who to call”.

How funny it is that people only think about working on or attending to their marriages when things are bad. But we hardly do anything to work on or improve on our relationships when things are seemingly okay. When is the last time you and your spouse read a book on marriage or attended a marriage seminar? If there is one area that many of us are failing in, it is in this very important area of our lives that we so often leave unattended.

Great marriages don’t just happen by accident. Probably the single key most important ingredient in succeeding in marriage is the fact that a couple is unwilling to settle for just getting by in their relationship. It never ceases to amaze us (once crisis has been averted) how many couples are willing to settle for the status quo, instead of moving forward and taking their love to the next level. What they don't realize is that if nothing is done to improve on the relationship, they will find themselves in another crisis or a similar crisis like the one they had before.

Make Your Marriage a Priority. Invest in it and don’t just wait for things to go bad before you seek for help. They say that if it isn’t broken, don’t fix it. But in coaching we say that if it isn’t broken, make it better. Therefore keep your relationship tools sharpened, by attending marriage conferences, reading books and enlisting the help of a coach to hold you accountable in your relationship.