WHY MEN ALSO NEED
"CHAMAS"
Last night I had an awesome time
with a group of men that I meet with every week. They are my “four crazy”
friends, men who I know can stand with me and support me. Men I can share
anything with, be it my financial struggles, struggles in my relationship with
my wife and children, work related problems or even my sexual problems. These
are men with whom I feel safe to bare myself with.
You see most of us men walk around in masks, trying to pretend that we are tough, we are macho men with our six pack. But deep inside, we are scared boys, like Adam hiding behind fig leaves because we are ashamed. We try to cover up for our shortcomings by our performance, appearance or status. But deep inside we are crying for someone to help us. Unfortunately our wives can't, because we are trying to hide ourselves even from them. In fact its because of this hiding that we have closed ourselves to them and they are bearing the brunt of our issues.
It is only as we bare ourselves to fellow men that we can truly find ourselves. Men with whom we can become naked and yet not be ashamed. As John Eldredge, author of the book wild at heart, recounts, so much
healing took place in my life through my friendship with Brent. We spent a lot
of time together. Just spending time with a man I truly respected, a real man
who loved and respected me – nothing heals quite like that. At first I feared
that I was fooling him, that he’d see through it any day and drop me. But he
didn’t, and what happened instead was validation. My heart knew that if a man I
know is a man thinks I’m one, too, well then; maybe I am one after all.
Remember--- masculinity is bestowed by masculinity.
