SUCCESS LIKE CHARITY MUST START AT HOME

Joe is a workaholic who wins at work. He thrives on conquest, whether it is people or deals. Fifteen hour days consume him. He's proud of the lifestyle he has provided for his wife, Sue. After all, he has achieved the Kenyan dream of having it all: a large home in a gated community, a three-car garage with two new cars, and kids going to one of those expensive British- curriculum schools.

But what defines success in industry doesn't necessarily define success at home. The work that provides all the toys is nothing other than the "other woman" in Sue's eyes; work is the mistress that is robbing her of her husband's focus and attention. She's being squeezed out of his daily planner and whenever she complains, Joe reminds her of how hard he has to work to provide for the family. As much as she is enjoying the wonderful luxury that Joe is providing, she fears that she is slowly and slowly losing him. They are becoming isolated from each other.

When the doors of the master bedroom suite close them off from the rest of the house, the two people inside are closed off from each other as well. Joe may conquer at work, but he's not winning with her. If he truly cared about her, he would be as eager about spending time with her as he is about spending time at work. Most days he is so spent by the time he gets home that he doesn't have the emotional energy to satisfy her heart needs, and Sue responds by rejecting his sexual advances.

If a man wants great sex with his wife behind the bedroom door, he needs to work on the way he relates to her outside those doors. He needs to know that his wife connects to her sexuality through her emotions. And so when he expends his energies connecting with her emotionally, he will in turn reap the benefits of great sex and subsequently a great relationship.

Thus success like charity, must begin at home. Otherwise what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loose's his wife. After all what are you working for if by the end of it all you have nobody to enjoy that success with?

THE BEST THING I CAN DO TO MY KIDS 

Kudos to all you Mamas out there. Last Sunday, Mothers day was celebrated world over. This is a day set aside to remember the sacrifices and selfless lives that our Mothers live. Where could we be without our Mothers. As one Spanish Proverb says, "An ounce of Mother is worth a ton of Priest". In other words these people we call Mothers are far more important than even our Local Priest or Pastor.

Sad to say that we only remember the good work Mothers do in this one Sunday in a year. No wonder someone said that Mothering is one of those thankless jobs a woman does. I wonder what we menfolk are doing to appreciate those women who have borne us those children and who do continue day by day investing their lives into those little ones. As we celebrate our Mothers, married men, let's not forget to celebrate our wives.  It's easy not to notice the good work they do and tend to focus on the small things that they forget to do or haven't been doing well of late.

I remember several years ago, during my college days, reading these words in a plaque at my Pastor's house " The best thing a Father can do to his children, is to love their Mother".  Right then I made this my lifelong ambition, to love the Mother of my children. For that is the best thing I can do to my kids. There is no point doing all those good things to your children if you don't love their Mother. Let them grow up knowing that Daddy loves Mummy. Demonstrate your love for her in front of them. Don't be shy, let them not just know but see that truly, Daddy 'anapenda' Mummy.

That way you will raise secure and confident children as that is the right environment for such to happen. And that is the best thing, you dear husband, that you can do to your kids.


Join us for a Parenting Workshop dubbed "What I wished my Parents knew",
When: Next Saturday May 26th from 8.30am to 4.00pm
Where: At the TRC Offices (Opposite Yaya Centre, next to the Ethiopian Orthodox Church).
How Much: Charges 1,000/= ppx inclusive of Lunch and Seminar notes.
Book early to avoid disappointment as only 30 spaces are available.
Mpesa no. 0708-909-875 or call Joanna on the same number.